Some more about my life.

Well i need something to do in between video games and nothing else to do, so i am going to write in my blog.

So about my earlier post.  Time to expand i guess.  To make it easy, the medicine i take to keep my blood sugar under control also gives me some mild form of diarrhea.  So yesterday i was sitting on the toilet for the third time in about a hour and all of a sudden its like I’m pissing out of my anus.  Its happened before and it is not a great feeling.  But it does make for some curiosity from a certain standpoint.  So you’re like wondering, “IS this what it feels like for a woman to take a piss?”  Thankfully “pissing out a shit” doesn’t happen very often and so far there isn’t much i can do medication-wise so i am kinda stuck.  But its better then doing injections.

My job.  Like I said before in another post I am starting to hate working with black people, even though i am black myself.  My mother says that the types of people jobs in fast food attract would generally clash with someone like myself.  It’s funny because 10 years ago i would have felt right at home with the people i am working with now.  But now all i feel is a sense of annoyance with many of them.  They are immature, loud, and crude.  They are nosy and can’t seem to take a hint.  I am not interested in being a member of their ‘happy family’.  All I am interested in is doing my job well, going home, and collecting my paycheck every two weeks.  The sad thing is I am constantly told that I am too slow in putting together the biscuits so the general manager feels that I am not suited for the job.  But i am truly trying my best.  Maybe I’m not cut out to do what I’m doing back there.  But i am still going to try to stick with it.  Why?  Because i realize what a annoying little cunt i used to be back when i was in my 20’s.  I see so much of what people used to say about my behavior back then, but i couldn’t see it.  Maybe this is karma.  Or maybe God is giving me a good lesson before i move on to something better.  So for now I am there.  On another note though i may be getting a job at the new Texas Roadhouse that will be opening in August.  I pray i do get the job there as a dishwasher.  I washed dishes for much of my working life when i was younger and i was always good at it.  So i may as well go back to it.  Hopefully in August I’ll get the job.

Family and Home.  Well my family is doing good.  They are all healthy and happy.  That’s a good thing.  My house is still standing.  So that’s a good thing too.  But things are different.  I went out and bought some wash and dish cloths for the house a couple of weeks ago and so far i am quite pleased with them.  I should have done this years ago but i was lazy, forgetful and didn’t spend my money very well either.  Now that I have the extra cash I will spend it much more wisely.  I will buy things to make my life better.

My Health.  Blood Sugar is doing well.  I am sleeping well at night.  Beyond anything else i am fine.

Naturism.  Well i am still nude around the house as much as I can be.  Its the one thing i miss now that i have work to do.  I am still holding out for a chance to go to a naturist resort some time this summer.  But with work and some money issues I may not be able to do it.  We’ll see.

Also by the way i turned 38 July 16th.

Gotta love Life sometimes.

Work was kinda shitty today.  But for some reason as I write this i feel a lot better about it all.  Life is good right now in a lot of ways.  On Wednesday i get paid, my car has air conditioning, and I have my health.  Although my driver side door no longer opens and I am literally pissing out of my ass thanks to Metformin.  Yeah I finally have a small idea of what its like to have a vagina.  I have to admit i find the whole idea kinda interesting.  From a physical point of view, I have not gone gender-queer yet and have no plans to.

Hurting but Happy.

Well since Saturday night i have had a very sore back.  Its been hard to move and pain pills only do so much.  I can barely find a comfortable position to sleep in.  But i have good news.  I got a job working at Hardees.  So in a few days i start working and I’ll make $7.75 an hour.  I’ll be working from 4 AM to maybe 12 noon.  Sounds good to me, i need the extra money.

Happenings.

Well i have to apologize.  It has been 4 months since my last post.  But if you read my last post then you know I’ve been busy, and yeah i have been through a lot.

First off, my diabetes.  Yeah i still have diabetes.  All hopes for it suddenly disappearing have been dashed.  But i have managed to keep my blood sugar under control.  Since i have contracted this condition my resistance to being cold has dropped even more.  Forcing me to wear something around the house in order to keep warm unless I crank up the heat and run up heating bills I can barely pay for, so pj’s and t-shirts are the new fashion around the house.  It sucks but I’ve gotten so used to it now I barely think about it.  It feels like I may have to give up my at-home nudist title during the winter and early spring

I just started taking Metformin about a month ago and while it hasn’t radically changed my life, its given me a bit of a buffer so i can enjoy more food now. I am still doing some injections each day.  The reason why is because my A1C is at 9.3 and it needs to be at 7.5 or 7.0.  Considering the fact that i was at 15.1 when i left the hospital 4 months ago, my endocrinologist says that its a good improvement.  I was hoping it would be around 8.0 or 7.0.  Exercising has been the major problem because of the cold, and now because of the rain.  At this rate I’ll have to start going to the mall and walking in doors to get some exercise, and that will cost me some gas.

In the family drama corner I finally had to detach myself from my cousin Quanisha and her older sister Tenika.  Maybe I’ll write about it later but they did something to piss me off so no more rides from me, and that was about two months ago.  Suffice to say i haven’t been out or had any real fun for myself since the hospital.  Other then visiting family; i just work and stay home.  Why, because my meds are so expensive and i barely have any money left.  Its been a pain, but i have to admit, being depressed and having a online game to occupy my time has made it easier.  But tonight i am going out.  Well i can only hope that life gets better from here on out.

So i have diabetes.

Yeah.  Sorry i haven’t written about this until now but i’ve been busy dealing with so much that has happened since December 17th.  But lets get to the point.  This post is part blog post and part diary entry so i can remember everything that happened that day.

Since thanksgiving i had been dealing with having blurry vision.  Things got worse on the 15th of December when i started pissing a lot and constantly being thirsty.  At first i thought it was merely the flu and me drinking way too much soda.  But on Monday I decided to go to my local doctor and see if he could work me in.  Well i spoke with his nurse and she came back to me and told me that my doctor said i should go to the emergency room with the symptoms I had, and so off i went to urgent care instead.  At urgent care they had a three hour wait.  I really thought about and decided to go to the emergency room instead.  When i arrived at the emergency room it was already full up with people and it was 7 PM before they actually saw me.  And I had been there since 12 PM.

They had already taken some blood from me while i was in the waiting room, so when they finally got me to a room in the emergency wing they had me lay on some kind of exam bed and wait.  About 30 minutes later a nurse appeared and decided to give me a blood sugar test.  She pricked my finger and got the blood, the glucose meter beeped and then she looked at me with wide eyes and said, “My meter can’t even read you.  That means your blood sugar is really high.  I’ll be right back.” And out the door she went.  A few minutes later they are hooking me up to a IV and telling me that my blood sugar was over 800 and that i was a diabetic.

Yeah i was shocked to say the least, maybe even dismayed.  But before i could panic or get really upset that song from the movie “Frozen” started going through my head.  Yeah that song, “Let It Go.”  Suffice to say that song had been stuck in my head on and off for days.  I have no idea why it popped up at that moment, but it calmed me down a lot and just said that i would deal with it.

So i called my parents and they arrived and sat with me in the room.  I just felt sort of upset but mostly calm, in fact i felt kinda dopey, even though i had not been given any kind of medication.  At least i knew what was wrong and what i had to do.  I just laid there and talked with my parents for more then two hours before they went home because they were tired.  The nurses told me i would be stuck in that room until they had one open up and then around 10 PM they told me they were admitting me and the doctor that visited me told me that there was a good chance that i could beat the whole thing if they got me started on insulin and Metformin early on.  That cheered me up a little but i had no idea how i was going to implement all of his suggestions.

Later on that night they moved me to a different room in the Emergency area, and i was supposed to go to sleep, but i didn’t.  How could i?  I had just been diagnosed with a life changing illness and to top it off the monitor seemed to beep every twenty minutes.  Around 3 AM they came to do the morning blood tests, and so by about 4 maybe 5 AM i went to sleep.  At 8 AM i woke up, my parents came in around 9 AM and they also fed me.  The food was crap in my opinion.  It was cold and it was diabetic food so yuck.

About two hours later they moved me to the Rapid Treatment center and told me that i would be discharged later that day.  My parents went out and bought me some clothes since i was wearing a hospital gown my by then.  At 2:30 PM they discharged me with some insulin injectors and a good-bye.  Before i walked out of there i said good-bye to another man who came into the emergency room around the same time i did.

I spent the night at my parents’ place and during the day and night i was there my vision improved and i learned everything i needed to know about diabetes and injecting insulin and how i needed to change my eating habits.  The next day though i was ready to go home and just be left alone so i could process everything that had happened to me.  Suffice to say, that didn’t really happen.  A lot happened in between the 17th and tonight.  I will post on that later.  But now I’ve updated myself and everyone who follows my blog.  And now i have a new category to add to my list: diabetes.  :(

Emotional Roller-coaster for Thanksgiving.

Well as the title states it was a hell of a ride for Thanksgiving and beyond.  A couple of days before Thanksgiving I traveled with my parents by car to Ohio to be with my brother’s family for Thanksgiving.  We stayed from Tuesday to Saturday, making it back around 5 pm Saturday.  I took all sorts of pictures and played with my baby nephew who has just begun walking over the last month.  He takes a few steps and then falls over.  Its a good laugh and we all cheer him on as he looks at us with a big grin on his face!

But on the day we left to go to Ohio i got a call around 4 Am from my friend Tasha.  Her ex-husband and father of her two children had died just a couple of hours before she called me.  I was trapped between staying in town to comfort her or go with my family.  As you can see from reading above, i decided to go with my family, i had already made the commitment.

On the way home i also realized that i had either a really bad cold or the flu because i felt like crap the whole way home.  Saturday night i had chills.  I managed to make it to the funeral on Sunday afternoon and back home.  The funeral was a somber affair, i won’t go into details about how Fred died, but suffice to say it was sad none the less.  After that for about 3 days more i was battling whatever i had until i felt better.  And during those three days i had cousins asking for rides and such, i was not in a good mood, but i made it through.  On Tuesday i went to the doctor to ask about the ASG and how long i was supposed to wear the thing.  The nurse couldn’t give me a straight answer.  Although she did suggest that i should wear it when i had a need to.  At that time i took that advice to mean i had to figure it out for myself, since she apparently could not or did not ask the doctor since he was not there.  So i decided not to wear the ASG anymore since i felt i didn’t need it.

That idea lasted all of 3 days when i began to feel some tenderness and soreness in my right testicle again.  So i have been wearing the ASG on and off.  The thing is so damned uncomfortable though, so i wear it sparingly.  I finally decided to order something better online, cost me a total of twelve bucks for one pair on Amazon.  Although to be honest some of the sexy stuff looks a lot more comfortable, I just feel too embarrassed to even order the stuff, let alone wear it.  After i have all my bills sorted out though i may order another pair.  Just to have two comfortable pairs instead of one.

Beyond that I have a appoint with the urologist on the 7th of January.  I wonder why i have to wait so long.